Saturday, April 23, 2011

He who is of little love is also of little faith

My great grandmother had that quote on her fridge.  I wrote it down one day, not really because of the meaning but because it reminded me of my grandmother and I figured she wouldn't be around forever... I was wrong, she wasn't around forever but until she was 102! I never really thought of the meaning until recently. 

Every relationship we have requires faith.  Faith in yourself, in the other person, in your abilities as humans, faith that good will come of it, etc...  Faith to believe in something you can't see or have a perfect knowledge of.  A desired outcome you hope for and believe in.  (That is marriage right there)  I am not only talking about marriage, faith is required in friendship any relationship really. 

The part where it is scary is it isn't a perfect knowledge.  We have no idea what the future holds, non what-so-ever!  That's where the hope comes in.  We hope for our dreams, we believe they can happen, we trust another person with our secrets, our hearts, our lives and pray for the best.  That's all we can do, so much is in our control but so much isn't.  We try, organizing things, creating traditions, putting routines in place, making our lives as predictable as possible hoping that all will go just as we want.  Control freaks are born.

It can get to you, stressing out like that, worrying about things that you can't control so, don't.  Let go, have faith, because really so much isn't our business to control.  Trust that someone has your best interest at heart and is orchestrating your life, all you have to do is follow.  Feels good to think all you have to do is listen, trust and do.  I don't need to know how things will work out, or why?  Just that it's what someone has planned for me and it will make me a better person and bring me more happiness than I would have been able to. 

Every person that has dated has experienced some form of heartache.  There is never going to be a way to guarantee a relationship before you commit to it, or even afterwards.  All you can do is love the best you know how, trust you will be loved in return and have faith in what you have together.  I do know if there is doubts or a lack of love it's because you don't believe in yourself or in love. 

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Life goes on... so do I! I am taking someones advice, it wasn't why I called but it helped more than I thought it would. I feel free, like a weight has been lifted....

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Do you know where you are going?

Truth is truth.  If a thousand people believe something foolish, it is still foolish!  Truth is never dependent upon consensus of opinion.  I have found that it is better to be alone and acting upone the truth in my heart than to follow a gaggle of silly geese doomed to mediocrity.  If you worry about what other people think of you, then you will have more confidence in their opinion than you have in your own.  Poor is the man whose future depends on the opinions and permission of others.  Remember this, if you are afraid of criticism, you will die doing nothing!
Getting started, getting finished- both ends of a journey require a demonstration of passion.  Passion is a product of the heart.  Passion is what helps you when you have a great dream.  Passion breeds conviction and turns mediocrity into excellence!  Your passion will motivate others to join you in pursuit of your dream.  With passion, you will overcome insurmountable obstacles.  You will become unstoppable.
Nothing great was every accomplished by a realistic person!  Most people fail at what they attempt because of an undecided heart.  Should I? Should I not? Go forward? Go back?  Success requires the emotional balance of a committed heart.  When confronted with a challenge, the committed heart will search for a solution.  The undecided heart searched for an escape.  A committed heart does not wait for conditions to be exactly right.  Indecision limits the almighty and his ability to perform miracles in your life.  He has put the vision in you-proceed?  To wait, to wonder, to doubt, to be indecisive is to disobey God. 

Mirror of Rejoice OR Regret

Great leaders. Great achievers. Are rarely realistic by other people's  standards. Somehow, these successful people, often considered strange, pick their way through life ignoring or not hearing negative expectations and emotions.  Consequently, they accomplish one great thing after another, never having heard what cannot be done. Never tell someone what they can't do. God may have been waiting centuries for someone ignorant enough of the impossible to do that very thing!
What is the difference in people when they hit despair?  Why does one person take his own life while another moves to greatness?  Circumstances are rulers of the weak but, they are weapons of the wise.  Must you be bent and swayed by every situation you encounter?  Are your emotions and resolve controlled by circumstances?  Circumstances do not push or pull.  They are daily lessons to be studied and gleaned for new knowledge and wisdom.  Knowledge and wisdom that is applied will bring about a brighter tomorrow.  A person who is depressed is thinking too much about the way things are now and not enought time thinking about the how he wants things to be. 
All men are driven by faith or fear-one or the other-for both are the same.  Faith or fear is the expectation of an event that hasn't come to pass or the belief in something that cannot be seen or touched.  A man of fear lives always on the edge of insanity whereas a man of faith lives in perpetual reward. Faith is a sounder guide than reason.  Reason never makes room for miracles; faith releases miracles. Reason can only be stretched so far, but faith has no limits.
Ever think about things that never were?  Dreams and goals of the less courageous.  How the world could be very different because of one person?  We know of those people who succeed but, what about those that were close and gave up?  The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but what he almost wins.  As a human, we detour and ease off because we lack understanding.  We quit because we lack faith.  Constant detours do not bring a man into the presence of greatness.  Detours do no build muscle.  Detours do not provide life's lessons.  Between you and anything significant will be giants in your path.  Easing off does not make the going easier.  Neither does it guide one to the desired destination.  Most men ease off when the going is rough.  Most slow down when the road appears treacherous.  These are the times when you must feel the weight of your future on your shoulders- the throbbing, unstoppable strength of desting coursing through your veins.  Times of calamity and distress have always been producers of the greatest men.  The hardest steel is produced from the hottest fire; the brightest star shreds the darkest night. 
Truth needs no evidence, of course.  There will be those who spend eternity examining a reflection of the person they could have become. 

Thursday, April 14, 2011

unattainable peace of mind

Life gives me opportunity disguised as troubles I hope to overcome.  One in particular is overwhelming, has been for months, I keep trying to move on from it, to conquer it.  I keep changing my approach, hoping to see a different angle but, it all seems to be in vain. 
What gets me through my days? 
I am not sure, painting a world that I hope to exist,
running constantly not sure if I am running to something
or away from something but running none the less.
I feel like I am trying to crack a code that only I seem to lack the combination to.
Guessing, pondering, contemplating and running into dead ends before I even begin. 
The problem won't leave
even if I give up on it, there it is.
Haunting, teasing, watching my attempts for success knowing its just out of reach.
I feel like I am stuck in that Greek myth, the one where the man is in a river of water and when he lowers to drink the water falls and he is unable to quench his thirst.  It is right there, he can see it but it is out of his reach, just close enough to desire it  over all else, to keep his thirst at the front of his mind.  It toys with him, he knows he won't be able to drink but, he can't help but try... He'll never have that drink only the hope of it, and unfortunately it isn't enough.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Let me not to the marriage of true minds

 Admit impediments. Love is not love

Which alters when it alteration finds,

 Or bends with the remover to remove:

O no! it is an ever-fixed mark

 That looks on tempests and is never shaken;

It is the star to every wandering bark,

 Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.

Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks

 Within his bending sickle's compass come:

Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,

 But bears it out even to the edge of doom.

If this be error and upon me proved,

 I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

    William Shakespeare

Who will I Be?

I have pondered the question "What do I want to be when I grow up?" for the better part of my adult life.  It has consumed me, the vast possibilities. How to choose the one? Which would I be best at? Which will bring me the most success? Part of what made this a monumental task for me, was the fact that I was also attaching it to my character, my being. "What will I do?"  That's what I meant by "What will I be when I grow up?" I had put my self-worth in that question.  Realizing the difference, I now find that very separate from "Who will I be? "

The relief I found was I will be me always. The qualities I posses, my abilities, my character, ME, will ultimately stay ME no matter what I do. Then the relevance of what I will do seemed far less intimidating as who will I be. Who am I?  What qualities have I developed? How do I display me?  Are my actions an accurate portrayal of the person I am?  Who do I hope to become?  I wrote a list of the qualities I have and hope to obtain.  Then I looked them all up and wrote down their definitions.  It only made sense to me to know what I am and what I want to be to become "her".  I am pleased with my progress thus far and look forward to the woman I can become.  Leaving my character up to chance seemed reckless so, I have taken action, I am now mindful in everything I do and say and make sure it resignates with me.  That it is the proper representation of my being and aspirations.

In doing this I hope for a more accurate focus and perspective.  I hope for more joy during the journey we call life. Mastering who I am doesn't so much help with the "what will I do?" but it does aid with the approach.  I know how I will choose to act, in every aspect of my life.  My way of life, philosophies of my relationships and interactions with people are very clear, its as though I am living life on purpose.  People are not in my life by mistake, they are there because I want them there, I do not leave things unsaid, there is reason.  I am who I am on purpose.  Purpose gives love, friends, family, life meaning, importance and value.  Don't let your life happen accidentally, give yourself a reason to live.  Deepen your existence, master your emotions, live to enjoy life in it's moments.  That is all we have.